1999 Called, They Want Their Bandwidth Back
The following is an email I sent today to the Emerson College IT department:
I like to think of myself as a fairly patient person but the technology at this school is down right pathetic more often than not. The inability to do the simplest things has forced me to completely reevaluate how I spend my downtime on campus.
My biggest quarrel is with the wireless internet access. Connecting to the internet is a serious obstacle. I can’t tell you how many times I have to click “try again” when attempting to access EC Mobile. If I manage to make some leeway in my arduous connection process, I am rewarded with watching “Authenticating… Authenticating… Authenticating…” scroll across the top of my shiny Mac indefinitely.
Now, as ridiculous as it sounds, let’s say, hypothetically, I manage to get online. On a good day I can load a webpage in less than a minute. Whilst waiting for said webpage to load I enjoy watching the strength of my wireless signal fluctuate like John Kerry’s political positions in the 2004 Presidential campaign. (I realize the preceding was an outdated joke but it is appropriate when referencing Emerson’s outdated wireless service.)
There is one other thing that seriously irks me. These little print stations located all over Emerson, especially the one on the fourth floor IT offices, are the slowest machines I have ever encountered. The other morning I had thirty minutes to print four pages before class. You would think that would be ample time. You would think wrong. I timed it. Honestly, I did. (I’m very OCD.)
It took me three minutes just to log in and get the desktop up on screen. (This included the delayed appearance of characters in my user name and password as I typed them.) And don’t ask about the computer next to me, the person there was having the same issues. Once I got Internet Explorer to open I got two pop-up messages telling me some error had occurred. I had to close these then wait for the E-Campus page to load. Getting into my email was fairly simple but still slow. Trying to open a Word attachment was even slower. The real fun came when it was time for me to print. I clicked print and then waited; hoping, praying, pleading that my command would be accepted. It was, so I slid my card. I am NOT over exaggerating - it took four minutes for the swipe of my card to register. Then it took another minute just to get the screen to respond to my boney digit attempting to select the document I so desperately wished to print. Then it took another three minutes for the damn thing to acknowledge that yes, I do indeed wish to PRINT! And then of course the printer took its sweet time spitting out my four pages but that time is always a treat after what it took to get to this miraculous moment. These print stations seem to be getting slower by the day. What’s the deal, yo?
I wrote this because after nearly three years at Emerson I have observed that the college seems to be going backwards in terms of general technological competence. I mean sure we have fantastic editing labs and state of the art equipment, but if we can’t get online or print a freaking piece of paper then there is something seriously wrong here. I don’t place blame on one particular person or even one particular department. It’s obviously an all-around issue. But regardless of where the problems are, the simplest tasks have become grotesquely perturbing annoyances.
Sincerely,
Ryan Saucier