The Heat is On
The heat is on… In our apartment!
In the latest display of incompetence and negligence by our lord of the land, The Hamilton Company, the boiler in our building was fired up on this, the last day of May. They can turn the heat on the when it’s warm outside but in the dead of December they can’t seem to get the heat pumping. Currently it is hotter inside our apartment than it is outside – a truly remarkable feat!
I called maintenance a few moments ago and got to talk with the always angry, rude, and eternally pregnant secretary.
ME: Yes, I’m calling from 145 Street. The heat is on in our building. It shouldn’t be. It’s May.
HER: It shouldn’t be on. Are you sure?
ME: Yes. I’m standing over the radiator now. Steam is rising out of it.
HER: But is it hot?
ME: Yes. Steam usually implies heat.
HER: Okay. 345 Street.
ME: Actually, it’s 145 Street.
HER: Oh. 145? Didn’t your roommate call a couple of hours ago?
ME: Yes. The heat was on then too.
HER: Then you know we’ve already been made aware of the issue?
ME: I wanted to make sure something was being done because it’s hot as hell in here.
HER: Someone is working on the boiler as we speak.
ME: Great. So, if I walked down into the basement, someone would be there?
HER: Yes sir.
There was no one in the basement. I knew there would be no one in the basement. This is exactly what happened back on Thanksgiving in 2005. The heat was not working and it was freezing outside. I was assured, after I woke up shivering at two in the morning, that someone was down there fixing the boiler. There wasn’t then either. For the record, it took them more than a week to fix that problem.
Sauna anyone?