Last night The Daily Show with Jon Stewart was at the top of its game when talking about Sarah Palin and Joe “the plumber” going rogue.
You can see the full Fox News segment between Shepard Smith and Joe “the plumber” here.
Meanwhile, rougeness seems to be contagious. Last night on The Colbert Report, prominent conservative pundit Stephen Colbert endorsed (but does not support) Barack Obama for President.
Chris Matthews’ Giant Fucking Head® interviewed two ignorant, irrational Hillary Clinton supporters “who didn’t like how the democratic process played out” and are now vowing to vote for John McCain. They didn’t like how the democratic process played out. They actually said those words. These people are beyond sore losers. They are haters of democracy, enemies of the state.
What made it even worse was that they took a page from Fox News playbook and peddled the Obama is a Muslim lie. Classy.
I kept waiting for Chris Matthews to head-butt these two women. The circumference of his head could cover the area. It’s like two birds with one stone. Or rather two PUMAs with one giant fucking head.
Following the insanity, a young Obama supporter calmly articulated a completely rational rebuttal, only to be drowned out by PUMA Pride.
Fox News never lets US down with its patented fear mongering and Obama trashing. Now they’re incorporating Joe Biden. Apparently Obama + Biden = Osama Bin Laden. Not Babe Domain.
Oddly enough, Fox News has always used the Usama spelling when referring to the terrorist mastermind behind the 9/11 attacks. They even used the abbreviation UBL instead of OBL. But for some reason Fox News switched to the Osama spelling. I wonder why?
Fair and Balanced is an anagram for Candied Anal Barf.
Here goes all of my blogger credibility. (If I ever had any.) This is just too much fun to pass up.
A group of researchers claim they may be in possession of the body of (ready?) Bigfoot.
Lifelong Bigfoot tracker and documentary filmmaker of Bigfoot Lives, Tom Biscardi claims to have spent the weekend in Georgia (the state, not the country) viewing the carcass and that a team of scientists are performing analyses. They plan to release photos and DNA evidence at a news conference in Palo Alto, California Friday.
Now — and this is the part involving aforementioned “credibility” — according to the website Cryptomundo, Tom Biscardi prematurely shot his wad by uploading the photographs to his own website: Searching for Bigfoot.
So basically these alleged photos of what may be Bigfoot are already on the web. Both sites were running pretty slow but I managed to snag one of said photos. It should also be noted that decomposition has caused the creature’s tongue to stick out. Yeah, that’s right. A photo of what very well could turn out to be an elaborate hoax is literally sticking its tongue out at us.
Is this the missing link between man and ape? The entrails of some poor random animal thrown on top of an expensive costume? Or just the body of your average backwoods Georgia resident? Judge for yourself and find out the legitimacy Friday.
Personally, I wouldn’t be surprised if this was a viral marketing campaign for a remake of Harry and the Hendersons. Also not helping the believability case is the fact that Tom Biscardi will be on Fox News Wednesday morning to discuss the, uh, discovery…
Loren Coleman, author of the book Bigfoot! : The True Story of Apes in America, posted a statement on Cryptomundo saying:
I feel, in all honesty, this, indeed, may be the real deal, and I say this carefully after reviewing information that has been shared privately with me. I cannot say more yet. But people will be very surprised.
While The Decider ogles Olympic volleyball players in China, a fucking war is raging between Russia and Georgia. Not that we here in America would know seeing as how sex and scandal always outsells despair and anguish. Georgians are literally begging for America’s help and telling the story of a great betrayal by the West. Someone must have told them that our military is busy securing delicious oil.
The following horrific images you won’t see on CNN or Fox News. I found them via a Live Journal I couldn’t even read. They are not for the faint at heart.
(graphic depiction of war)
Fox News is trying to make John McCain appear younger by using footage of the 71 year old senator from the 2000 presidential campaign. Back then McCain was a youthful 63.
MSNBC’s Dan Abrams caught the deception.
Finally! My two favorite things in the whole world have come together: Bill O’Reilly and mayonnaise. Well, not really. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I do enjoy mayonnaise, but I don’t typically enjoy Bill O’Reilly. He’s not very good between two pieces of bread — white bread ONLY, mind you. I prefer turkey, not bologna. But for once I did actually find some amusement in Bill O’Reilly.
The amusement comes in the form of O’Reilly’s phony outrage and confusion over a Heinz mayonnaise commercial airing in Great Britain only. In the commercial, two men share a kiss, thus making them evil mayonnaise-pushing homosexuals. It’s the “gay thing” that confuses O’Reilly. He thinks the underlying subtext is not about mayonnaise but rather about tolerance and gender blending:
So why are they doing that? Why — it was… It was obviously a gay thing. Now I don’t know what the message is, other than gay people like mayonnaise… I’m confused. This whole gender blending thing. It’s confusing to me… I just want mayonnaise. I don’t want guys kissing.
You’ve got to watch the video. O’Reilly is the only one who seems “outraged” by the commercial. Everyone else is just enjoying a good laugh…at O’Reilly’s expense.
My favorite part: “This is not a gay issue. It’s a mayonnaise issue.” Priceless.
They should have known that you can’t talk about mayonnaise for too long before you start to find the situation utterly absurd, which is exactly what happened. And what was with the obscure Wile E. Coyote reference? What point was that guy trying to make?
Now every time Bill O’Reilly slathers mayonnaise on a sandwich he’s going to think of the gays having the sex — doing it live.
When reached for comment, Ketchup wouldn’t respond on the issue, even after pressing him hard and turning him upside down. But after a few minutes at the right angle, he spilled everything.
Mustard didn’t immediately return phone calls, though some sources have alluded to the possibility of a crusty clog in the tip. Critics have harshly accused Mustard of being yellow in the past.
[source: Think Progress]
Rachael Ray is a lot of things: annoying, loud, untalented, gassy, trashy, wide, bilious, skanky, indolent, abominable, abhorrent, bigheaded, smutty, vile, crude, uncouth…But is she a terrorist?
Well, Fox News thinks she just might be one. In a recent television spot for Dunkin’ Donuts — Rachael Ray’s favorite brand of coffee — Ray is wearing a scarf that Fox News commentator Michelle Malkin said resembled a kiffiyeh, a Middle Eastern garb that is “popularized by Yasser Arafat and a regular adornment of Muslim terrorists appearing in beheading and hostage-taking videos.” Charming.
According to MSNBC, Dunkin’ Donuts actually pulled the TV spot citing: “…the possibility of misperception detracted from its original intention to promote our iced coffee.”
But Rachael Ray is not alone. According to Malkin, other secret terrorist cells include actor Colin Farrell, rapper Kanye West, and Democratic National Committee Chairman Howard Dean, all of whom have been photographed in similar scarves that were “distinctive hate couture.”
Contradicting Malken’s scarf theory is the website Stuff White People Like. According to them, white people love scarves:
White People’s body temperatures do not operate on logical or consistent levels, and because of this white people are often forced to wear clothing combinations that might seem strange or illogical. One popular example is the performance vest which solves the age old problem of cold chest hot arms. Another common combination is wearing shorts with a sweatshirt which helps bring about comfort when your upper body is chilly but your lower half is sweltering. But without a doubt, the one piece of clothing that helps to regulate white body temperature in all situations is the scarf.
As Fox News has taught me over the years, only Muslims and Democrats are terrorists. Perhaps Michelle Malkin should start a website called Stuff Terrorists Like. They could even use the slogan, “Death to America runs on Dunkin’.”
I guess this makes me a terrorist by association….
Fox News contributor Liz Trotta referred to Barack Obama as “Osama” then laughed it off and suggested that both Barack Obama and Osama bin Laden should be knocked off.
Wow. The full segment can be found here.
The American mainstream media could learn a thing or two or twelve from Al Jazeera. By examining racism in Kentucky, the Arabic news network boldly and bravely goes where CNN, MSNBC, and Fox News dare not tread — Kentucky.
Welcome to Kentucky.
Are the good sheeple of West Virginia the most racist, uneducated, and misinformed voters in America? Or will Kentucky top them next week? I’m willing to bet that the lovely white ladies who were interviewed by the news networks, and then showcased on The Daily Show last night got their learnin’ from the fair and balanced Fox News. I’m also willing to bet that each lovely lady has already ordered a Barack Obama t-shirt.
Watch and cringe. (The interviews start at 1:49.)
Now, let’s examine each quote one by one…
“I guess because he is another race. I’m sorta scared of the other race ’cause we have so much conflict with ‘em.”
Exactly what sort of conflict are the good sheeple of West Virginia having with other races other than white folk? Are there even any non-whites in West Virginia? Where do they hide? I bet in caves. Hell, I would too.
“He’s Muslim, and that has a lot to do with it.”
This woman obviously watches Fox News. I can’t think of any other place where she could have been fed that dribble. She probably also believes we found WMDs in Iraq. Fox News incorrectly reported that too, just like they have repeatedly reported that Obama is a Muslim.
“I don’t like the Hussein thing. I’ve had enough of Hussein.”
This woman is my favorite. You can see the seriousness in her eyes. She has had enough of Hussein! In her defense, she dated Saddam Hussein in college. I’m kidding! Saddam Hussein never went to college. But she was part of the resistance during the war when Iraq invaded West Virginia. So it’s understandable that she’s had enough of Hussein.
I wonder where she buys her muumuus…
Do you think the majority of West Virginians know that a plurality of the country is mocking them and having a good laugh at their expense? Do you think they even care?
Most intelligent people know that Fox News is nothing more than a conservative propaganda machine used to promote the ideology gone mad agenda of the Bush administration. Skeptics are always looking for proof that proves this, and, usually it’s more than abundant. You don’t even really have to look most of the time. But this is the first time I can ever recall someone on Fox News outright saying that the Pentagon pays Fox News, sends them on reports, and tells them exactly what to say. Well, that’s basically what happened on Hannity and Colmes tonight.
You can actually hear Sean Hannity cringe in the background as he was no doubt ordered to immediately silence Fox News “Military Analyst” Bill Cowan.
This is utterly retarded. Fox News recently conducted a poll to see who voters would vote for if the election was held today. It’s not the results of the Presidential poll that are interesting though. It’s the very bottom of the article that deals with one of the other questions asked of respondents:
Who does Usama bin Laden want to be the next president? More people think the terrorist leader wants Obama to win (30 percent) than think he wants Clinton (22 percent) or McCain (10 percent). Another 18 percent says it doesn’t matter to bin Laden and 20 percent are unsure.
I’m not one to typically end up on a Fox News blog but I did just that this evening when I landed on the official blog of Fox News Channel storm trooper, Major Garrett.
Garrett interviewed Hillary Clinton recently, and then spun her words into a web of lies. Then the Fox News Channel used that to drum up a storm between the Democratic candidates. Garrett put words into Hillary’s mouth that she never said. Here’s a snippet from the article:
Clinton also said Obama and Edwards have acted like hypocrites during the race and appeared to diminish the role Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. played in the civil rights movements, saying it wasn’t hope that King inspired that made the difference but President Lyndon Johnson’s decision to fight for and sign the Civil Rights Act into law.
Now watch the video and see if you can catch her saying anything remotely close to that. She doesn’t. In fact, the word “hypocrite” never came out of her mouth. It’s a deliberate fabrication conjured by Major Garrett and Fox News.
The saddest thing is that, of course, most of the comments are from the typical lobotomized Fox News viewer – the same people that put Bush in the White House and still support him. I doubt most of them bothered to watch the entire six-minute interview. They just took Fox News as the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth.
Thankfully, some of the comments are from Fox News viewers who don’t allow the propaganda network to make up their minds for them.
What a blatant misrepresentation of what Hillary actually said writer! As an American who happens to be black and who was actually marched for civil rights, I agree wholeheartedly with what Hillary actually said…it was the ACTION of President Johnson (and others) that brought Dr. King’s hopes to fruition. Her comments were not meant in any way to disparage Dr. King as the writer would have one believe. The fact is, hope alone feeds no man. We need a President who is capable of acting.
- CindyI think one of your particular talking points is absolutely wrong. She didn’t “appear to diminish the role Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. played” at all. Senator Clinton was shrinking Senator Obama’s lofty and melodramatic rhetoric down to actual size. At the end of the day, being “able to get it through Congress” is something she’s been doing longer. Ability to inspire by the “power of dreams” is a worthy and necesary talent for all social justice leaders…”becoming reality..”..she’s only saying she thinks she can do it better than Obama can.
Jesus Christ has inspired people for over 2000 years…Moses and Abraham for much longer…. and they never had to pass a law in any Congress in order to keep us bathed in the light of faith and hope. Many believe Moses handed down law from a source beyond our human existence.
Whenever a law that best forwards social justice is passed in the name of the people of this country, the law was one that was created long ago in the hearts of men and women.
There is no doubt that Rev. Dr. MLK Jr. was a man of God and an inspirer for the ages. Hillary Clinton was by no means discounting Rev. Dr. MLK Jr. by showing how his wonderful dream was put into action…and which President helped to facilitate the deam through government.
Isn’t that just a bit of as stretch to say the newest Senator of the top-tier-three is an inspirer of the ages and a JFK and an LBJ all wrapped up on one..and more capable than Clinton to get his agenda through Congress? How has he ever proven it?
If Hillary’s pointing that out, more power to her for the reality check.
- Jude
Now I’d like to point out some of the more imbecilic responses:
Once again Hillary puts her hubris to work for her. To hell with the party. To hell with Martin Luther King. The wounded lioness blindly lashing out because the world has not recognized her specialness.
She has had her good qualities but they are overwhelmed by her hubris. I will not miss her. But before she leaves the center stage I think she should return the money al those good people gave to finance Bill’s legal defense, one that would not have been necessary had he told the truth.
- Richard McDonoughThis makes me feel very sad. Now she’s slamming MLK Jr. in addition to Barack? Unbelievable. She is not seeming very presidential today, not at all. HRC should fire Mark Penn and Bill and go back to the drawing board, or, maybe even consider retirement. Things are not looking good for Mrs. Bill Clinton.
- WorkingMomInLAHilary’s comments are beyond offensive. In a few weeks, this country will celebrate the legacy of Martin Luther King, a man who died fighting for equal rights for all people. For this woman to belittle his achievements is the height of arrogance and desperation. Liberals like to pretend that they are racially enlightened, but comments like this prove that they are the real racists.
- LisaThis is just disgusting and I feel it is insulting of Martin Luther King and his role in the Civil Rights movement. This was really low and I think she should just pull out of the race now. She can not handle the pressure and is really losing it.
- amy R, Iowa
Now, this is where it gets really funny. This comment indicates that the video of the full interview was missing and that it stopped just as Major Garrett was about to ask the Obama question. Just further proof that Fox News viewers don’t need actual “facts.”
We Report. You Decide.
Dear Sherri Shepherd,
I’ve been too busy with school to anoint someone as Freak of the Week for the last few months but your perpetual mind boggling ignorance has forced my hand. Damn you.
You’ve already submitted, on live TV no less, that you think the world is flat, despite the overwhelming evidence to the contrary. News flash: the world is about as flat as your chest.
Now you’ve gone on record as saying “I don’t think anything predates Christians.” Lovable Joy Behar, God bless her, even tried to correct you with a little something we people call FACTS about the chronology of Greeks/Romans/Christians. But you could only reinforce that “Jesus came first before them.”
How the hell can someone as retarded as you be allowed on a nationally televised television program? You’re feeding the lifeless stay-at-home moms of America nothing but uneducated dribble. If you ask me, and you never will, I think it’s time Whoopi opened up a can of her patented Whoop-Ass® on you. Star Jones you are not!
Chins up, Sherri. I’m sure Fox News will be callin’ any day now. If not, you could easily secure a position in the The Decider’s cabinet. In the meantime, you’re just the freak of the week. In fact, I’d be willing to go as far to say that you might be the Cunt of the Month. Now look what you did, you made me use a horrible word.
An Arkansas woman just gave birth to her seventeenth child, Jennifer. Her husband, Joe Bob, was also there. All of their other children have names that begin with the letter J. They are: Joshua, 19; John David, 17; Janna, 17; Jill, 16; Jessa, 14; Jinger, 13; Joseph, 12; Josiah, 11; Joy-Anna, 9; Jedidiah, 8; Jeremiah, 8; Jason 7; James 6; Justin, 4; Jackson, 3; Johannah, almost 2; and Jennifer, freshly baked.
Jackson is a pretty cool name. So is James. I’m not sure how they pronounce ‘Jinger’. I’m gonna assume like ‘Ginger’. I wonder if they have a dog.
Poor little rich girl Paris Hilton is going back to jail. Her little scheme of a “medical condition” didn’t sit right with the judge. As of this moment, no documents have arrived to back up her supposed condition. Sometimes our justice system does work.
from CNN:
A judge has ordered Paris Hilton returned to jail to serve out her 45-day sentence for a probation violation in a reckless driving case. She was taken from court screaming. “It’s not right!” shouted the weeping Hilton. The frenzy over Hilton’s jail status began Thursday when sheriff’s officials released her because of an undisclosed medical condition and sent her home under house arrest.
See for yourself. This is REAL news according to: CNN | MSNBC | Fox News