Hello America, this is your old friend Teddington Earnest Dippingham with the latest in eatin’.
You know I’ve always said that pancakes could be quicker and easier to make. Ever since the dawn of time man has had to mix pancake mixture with eggs and milk and butter just to enjoy a delicious baker’s dozen [...]
(noun) \päp•tärt•ē\
A social gathering of invited guests involving the celebration and, typically, consumption of Kelloggs® brand Pop-Tarts® toaster pastry; a Pop-Tart® party.
Hello everyone. TED here back from a court-ordered hiatus for more eatin.
It’s been a long time since I posted but I’ve been busy traveling the world sampling erotic mayonnaises. As a matter of fat, I was recently an (unofficial) judge at the Cinco de Mayo(nnaise) festival in Hidden Valley, California. Of course [...]
I couldn’t sleep last night. It might have been the three gallons of coffee I consumed while driving back from doing things but I’m not sure. I tossed and turned and finally gave up. I sat up, lowered my legs to the floor and stared at the clock; it was just past midnight. There [...]
Read more »»I’m sick and tired of hearing people call America FAT. We’re not fat, we’re healthy! HEHEHE. As an engorged American, I am merely storing weight for a later date. You never know when the world’s food supply is going to run out. Why, if the Nazis came tomorrow to [...]
Read more »»HELLO AGAIN AMERICA, TED HERE WITH THE LATEST IN EATIN’….
WHILE SOME FAST FOOD CHAINS, LIKE THOSE SUPERCILIOUS BASTARDS AT MCDONALDS, ARE TRYING TO CREATE A HEALTHIER IMAGE FOR THEMSELVES, OTHERS ARE STEPPING UP TO FILL THAT BULBOUS VACANCY FOR LOYAL EATERS LIKE MYSELF. MCDONALDS AND WENDYS HAVE ELIMINATED THEIR RESPECTIVE SUPER-SIZING OPTIONS AND NOW [...]
BEFORE I GET TO THE EATIN, I’D LIKE TO THANK RYAN AND MEGORIOUS’ BOARD OF DIRECTORS FOR ALLOWING ME TO COME BACK AFTER THAT INCIDENT AT THE COMPANY CHRISTMAS PARTY. I HAVE AGREED TO PAY FOR THE DAMAGE INFLICTED ON THE XEROX MACHINE AND FOR COUNSELING SESSIONS FOR THOSE WHO CLAIM THEY WERE “DISTURBED”. [...]
Read more »»The following takes place between 8:30pm and 11:42pm.
8:30 - Dustin Hoffman narrates about movies and what they mean to us; the short is filled with scenes from Oscar nominated films and “Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure”.
8:33 – Chris Rock is already yelling and he makes a reference to “Rocky 5″. Bad joke made about [...]